Girls and Goys

So this weekend was my brother's Bar Mitzvah, and let me tell you: my brother (and thirteen year olds in general) are hilarious.

First of all, he's 13, which by definition means he's kind of awkward, but he seems so buoyant and happy. It's kind of insane. I mean, I was like the most miserable person alive at 13, and I think most people felt the same about themselves. Somehow, Eric found about 30 people to invite to his birthday bash. I asked to dance with him (in fact, I cut in on some girl who was mackin' on my brother) and we danced for about 20 seconds before he goes, "...Um, ok, well...I have to dance with someone else now." I gave him hell for that one, don't worry.



*UPDATE: This is actually someone ELSE'S Bar Mitzvah, so this is just typical of Eric, shown here as NOT the birthday boy. Even more hilarious? Yes. Also, if you click on it, you can see that there is, in fact, a fifth girl in there. I couldn't figure out how to get it to fit in the frame, but whatever. You get the point.

But the actual services were really awesome. I mean, at 13 there's no way I would have been able to do that. That's a lot of preparation for a kid his age. It was kind of weird though because there were all these songs that everyone else seemed to have memorized except, you know, my father and my sisters. So, we were all on stage at one point, and everyone is looking at us, singing a song they've known their entire lives, and we're all like...Baruch Atah Adoni? Or something?

But I got plenty drunk at the "Kid's DJ Party" and danced up a storm. And also my dad got lifted in a chair.



Love. It.

So, I realize it's been a while since my last real update. I apologize.

I've been getting anxious about the job search thing. I joined LinkedIn, I did what I think I'm supposed to do, but I don't really know what it is that I want to do. That becomes sort of a problem when you're writing cover letters about what you want to do to companies for whom you are supposedly going to do it.

I am also getting excited and nervous about the book thing. I have interviews scheduled with the mayor of Athens as well as a woman who has lived there pretty much her entire life (except for about 3 years during law school). I don't know what to ask them, pretty much at all. I mean, I know what answers I want, or at least an idea of what I want to get out of those interviews, but I don't know where to begin on getting that.

The quarter is going pretty well, I have an amazing course with the one and only Professor McHale, and one pretty good one, and the other two are just okay. I can deal with that. Light workload at the very least(except for all the reading McHale assigned...but, so worth it).

Also, there's the Alex question. I don't even know where to begin on that, except to say that I think I'm done. I'm just not sure that the friendship adds any value to my life, and it may in fact be depleting value. Hard to say.

Book Writing

I'm getting too excited about my book project to be able to write very much; I've been doing a lot of research and mapping.

I've also been working quite a bit on the job search thing, which isn't nearly as much fun. Who needs a back-up? Psssht.

I promise I'm not dead

It's been far too long...I'm usually pretty good about updating about every other day, but mom's computer suuuuuucks. It does this really awesome trick where it takes about a minute for anything you type to show up on the screen, so editing is not only frustrating, but at times impossible. So, that's a really cool trick. Also, I don't get cell service at home, so I have virtually no communication with the outside world out there.

Break was kind of a let down, mostly because I worked too much and was too exhausted to really enjoy myself. I didn't even get to buy jeans at the Gap Outlet, which is one of my favorite stores. Sigh.

Christmas Eve was nice (except my work shift that day). Kerrie and Sarah have adorable babies, and it's nice to get to see them then send them off. It's insane how many people I work with that had kids as teenagers (including one girl who was 14 when she conceived and 15 when her son was born. She's 16 now...woah). I cannot even begin to imagine what it must be like to have a child at this point in my life. There's one girl there that is my age that is married with child. That totally freaks me out.

Then on Christmas Day, as per tradition, Kate, Thomas, and I went to Louisville to see the grandma and dad's fam. I had a great time, and also as per tradition, we finished our puzzle late at night on the last night. It was nice to see dad and see that he really is doing well. I mean, I believed him, kind of, over the phone, but I am more frustrated than he seemed on the phone. Stupid Dooce.

Now I am even more excited about Eric's Bar Mitzvah. I even bought a dress to wear, which is incredibly fabulous. I was going to pay full price for it, then I saw a sign that I had somehow missed saying "40% off all dresses!!!!" Super exciting. Also, kudos to WhiteHouse/BlackMarket for exceptional customer service. They let me and Kate into the store after they were closed. We just figured that it was extended holiday hours, but we asked, and they go, "Yeah, we're closed, but what were you looking for?" amazing. Even more amazing is the dress itself.



I spent New Year's Eve in Burlington with Kerrie. It was a good time, but I tend to hate high-pressure drinking nights where I feel like the first and only option is to be wasted. It was also interesting because I didn't realize how much tension there is between Kerrie and Sarah. That is to say, a lot.

Sarah bought mom and Tim a 42" plasma screen TV. It was bit awkward for the rest of us, to say the least. I didn't really know how to react, and it was clear that mom didn't either, despite the fact that she later said she "really didn't think it bothered Kerrie that much..."

Kerrie and Greg brought it up at the party, and they were, in fact, really upset by it (shock!). Sarah married into money and all the sudden changed, apparently. I didn't really know herbefore she was dating Steve, so I can't comment on that, but it really was rude. I don't know, I guess if it were me I would have gone about giving someone a gift that large and showy in a different way.

Anyway, yesterday I drove to Ann Arbor to hang out with Kate and Thomas. It's been nice, and hey! Internet AND cell phone! Today we went shopping and I got two cute tops (one of which Kate also got, to maximize twininess!) and a sweater. All in all, very sucessful. For some reason, "after Christmas sales" means "sales for the rest of time, woah our numbers were low in '08!" Whatever, Chris is profiting!

In other news, I think I'm going to write a book. I'm working on a query letter and trying to find time to leave Columbus this quarter to write sample chapters. This may aid my job search. And by that I mean, I can see myself working more on my sample chapters than my resume. That's not a good idea.

Also, I don't know where to begin on the actual job hunt, where I have a clear plan for my book. How does one start applying for jobs? I hear that job search sites like Monster and whatnot are not effective, so how am I supposed to know who is hiring? I don't have the types of connections that other people have, and so... what now? Maybe I should just go to law school. Ha.

Rough Day

So this Honeybaked Ham thing is working out quite nicely. It may have to, because I got two emails today leading me to believe that I will never have a job. Ever.

1. I got rejected from the DDD position as a Field Consultant, which I kind of expected because I kind of lost the heart for it halfway through, and filled it out because what the hell. I'm not too terribly upset by it, except that...

2. Kraig Kann emailed me back today saying that GOLF CHANNEL is on a hiring freeze.


I am unemployable and inconsolable.

So far, so good

I got selected for Alternative Spring Break to Boston! It's going to be cold, but at least it'll be a great time. My "try everything because you're a senior and when the hell else will you get to do this kind of thing" plan so far is going pretty damned well. I got into The Vagina Monologues. I got selected for ASB. I am pretty happy about both developments.

The case of TVM seems to be a pretty fun bunch of girls, so I'm looking forward to getting to know all of them, and then immediately after that's over, it'll be time to turn over to my ASB Trip.

Then, it'll be time for spring quarter craziness! :D

...For now, it's finals week, and I'm going to a bar. No worries, all I have tomorrow is to turn in a paper (which is done) and proctor an exam for the Communication class that I "TA."

Holler?

Follow-Up

We have our first cast meeting for the Vagina Monologues tomorrow. I don't know how this is going to go. Everyone I know that auditioned got it, so I feel less excited about making the cast. Maybe everyone I know is just really talented. Including me. Right.

When I said that Mechanic is married, I want to clarify. I suggested the auto shop to a sorority sister, and she went, and saw...a ring. I did not go up there and ask him out, so for those of you hoping for an incredibly hilarious story, I am sorry to disappoint.

Also, I have not been taking Lexapro (for those of you not in the know, it is my amazing anti-depressant. My happy pill. Whatever, I love it and am not ashamed of my depression) lately. By "lately" I mean "for a full month," largely because mom was under the impression that Kate and I were covered under Tim's insurance, and we ended up not being, so when dad's insurance lapsed, Kate and I were no longer covered. At all. Tim was told about a month ago that, basically, they are downsizing the building inspection department (due to 1.buildings not needing to be inspected, because 2.no one is building anything, and therefore 3.no one is buying permits, so 4.there is no source of income or way to pay the inspectors). In other words, if Tim keeps his job, he will get a pay cut.

So I've been reluctant to fill the prescription at full price because I know that it's a rough time for mom and Tim. Mom yelled at me for not filling it (I didn't really tell her my reasoning), but I still don't feel right about it.

That said, I finally got the prescription filled for mom's sake Sunday when I returned to Columbus and have been taking it since, but it takes a good two weeks to get back into my system. So, the two days that I have been on it are doing virtually no good. And this is a bad time to not have Lexapro. It's stress season around these parts, and I would like to lift a bit of the finals-induced anxiety.

Then, yesterday, I got a very vague email that I am going to be even vaguer about, and I am kind of freaking out. I know it will be fine, that I'm filling in the gaps with things that I shouldn't, but not having Lexapro is a major issue already with finals, and now this... Again, cognitively I know that it's going to be okay, but this isn't really a cognitive issue.

...And now, off to get hot apple cider with Alex, who seems to be deciding to text me lately.

Thanksgiving, Among Other Things

Thanksgiving weekend is terrible because it's so wonderful and you know it lasts for all of four days before you have to return to the workload. And the worst part is, it's more work than usual. So here I am, superstressed post-Thanksgiving, having just been given a taste of what is to come.

But, all the same, Thanksgiving pies and broccoli cheese casserole and delicious things were all very delicious. I effing love Thanksgiving. Minus the "itis" you get afterward (Thank you, Patrick). I also realized that I kind of hate turkey. It's always dry I feel like. Even when people say it's really good, it tastes dry to me. So I eat lots of sides and am made even more happy.

Friday night I hung out with Mom, Kate, Thomas, and the Gavin girls. AND THEIR BABIES. Kyleigh is positively adorable. Brooklyn is kind of a bad kid, but she's cute also. And, you know, she has pierced ears, so Kate automatically thinks she's THAT. MUCH. MORE. beautiful, right?

Immediately after dinner Friday, Kate, Thomas, and I went to Loveland to celebrate with Thomas's Family. Talk about a change of scenery. My families are, on the one side, alcoholics, and on the other....well, I saw my grandmother take a sip of wine and I was a a little taken aback. So, playing flip cup (loudly) with the cousins is atypical. And we also had an aunt and an uncle playing along with. Craziness, I tell you. I guess that's how a lot of families do it, but I have these images of my childhood when we all sat at one table, my grandparents, Anne and Steve, Vickie and Jim, and me, Kate, and Dad. It was quiet and nice. And now there's all kinds of "crazy" with Eric and Kit and Ender and Destiny and Thomas...we spilled onto a second table.

...But we're still not playing flip cup in the garage, so I guess my definition of a crazy holiday is quite different than most.

Anyway, we got up Saturday morning and tasted cakes for Kate's wedding. It was a lot of cake. We had a piece of Cheesecake, then we went and had samples of like 6 different cakes and they were SO GOOD.

I highly recommend cake tastings for all those who ever have the opportunity. I really liked the pumpkin cake, but it's unfortunately inappropriate for a May wedding. Lame.

On a side note, I hate group projects.


And in late breaking news:

THE MECHANIC IS MARRIED.

Happy 120th Birthday!

It's the real Founder's Day... Thanksgiving Eve, 1888, Boston Bell Tower (It was actually November 27, so I guess I could just as easily celebrate tomorrow). Sarah Ida Shaw and Elenor Dorcus Pond embraced and said "Tri Delta is founded!" It's cool to be a part of something that has been around and roughly the same for 120 years. I know I'm overly cheesey, but like I said, it is very exciting.

Anyway, today I went to work at HoneyBaked Ham. My job is to show people ham. They tell me, "I have to feed 10 people," and I say, "You'll want 7 pounds of ham," and then I go get a 7 pound ham, and then I unwrap the foil, show them the front, then the side, then rewrap it and bag it, then point to a cash register. It's aaaaaaaawesome. Whatever, it's easy work and pays okay.

Now the entire staff (essentially) is going to Hooter's and I'm going with. The best part? I have a DD, so I'm going to drink a Blue Moon or two. Or... more?

I am feeling a general lack of motivation as far as school goes. I have a LOT of work to do this weekend, and at this motivation level, it will get done laaaaaaaate Sunday night and on into Monday. Woof. I cannot wait for this quarter to be over; none of my classes are really exciting me anymore. I discussed my course in postmodernism and it's lack of anything one might call "sense," but my Communication classes are insane amounts of busy work. I mean, they're easy, but it's just a matter of doing the work--which I don't really want to or feel the need to do. That's kind of a problem in week 8 of 10.

In other (very exciting) news, I got the dress and the shoes, and I am still obsessed with the shoes but could go either way on the dress. I need to decide quickly, however, because ModCloth.com's return policy is kind of strict. So, I need Kate to decide for me if it's a keeper.

Kyleigh (my stepsister Kerrie's 13 month old daughter--Kerrie is married to Greg, who manages the HoneyBaked Ham at which I work) is here and possibly the most adorable child of all time. She's having "wind-down time" at the moment, so I am unable to cuddle her and read to her and play fridge magnets with her (she looooves magnets!), but I did get some time with her yesterday. Babies are incredible. They're so functional and have so much understanding of the world, but can't even speak! THOUGH! She does say "CAT" when she sees my fatso catso, which is possibly the greatest thing I've ever seen. I wish my first word were "Cat." Mom says she thinks it was "Kate," so I'll pretend that it was actually cat. HA.

Is it normal that it bothers me that mom doesn't remember what my actual first word was, she's only kind of guessing? Dad, any insight?

So, many of my friends are on "team mechanic," and I'm torn. I guess I must explain. I had an issue with my axles on my car, and I'd known for a while I needed to get at least the driver side one fixed. So I've gotten several estimates, and they were all around $450 or so. So I finally just sucked it up and took in my car and mentally spent the $450. I'm sure my father will be very excited about that, as he was terrified by the noise my axles were making in August.

Well, I dropped it off at a shop about 3.5 blocks from the sorority house and about 6 blocks from my class that I was off to. I told him to check out the passenger axle and let me know if he thinks it's bad enough to warrant fixing.

Then he insisted on driving me to class. He said, "it's a long walk [again, about 6 blocks], and it's very cold outside." That last part was true, so I let him drive.

He called later and said that yes, it definitely was, but he felt bad upselling me, so he'd do it for $90. INSTEAD OF $220! When I heard him say $90, in my head, it was a $30 discount, then I later realized... no, that's $130. Holy. Crap. He told me he'd have it to me later that day.

He calls again later that day and said that in removing my axle, he noticed that the axle was fused to the bearing and that I had to get a new bearing, but he'd only charge me list price, no labor, so only about $40. Which for a car part is pretty cheap, though I'm not sure how much that particular one generally cost, he again didn't charge me any labor for its installation. He also apologized profusely because I couldn't pick up my car, despite promising it to me. I had told him when I handed over my keys that I needed it by Tuesday of this week so I could get home and didn't care about it any earlier than that. He goes, "Yeah...I know...but...I just feel bad, because I told you you could come in and now you can't."

Then he called me again the next day and said that the valve cover gaskets (?) were also broken and that I shouldn't bother replacing them, but I should be sure to check my oil level constantly. These are two apparently related facts. It would be around $400 to fix it, and he told me it wasn't worth it (this guy owns his own business, and I'm pretty sure if he told me to replace it I would have, or at least asked Tim about it). He also replaced my blown tire (another long and involved story not worth telling) and changed my oil so that adding the new oil from time to time would be more...something mechanic-y. I finally got to pick up my car.

I spent an hour to an hour and a half there talking to him, and I had him look at my shifter that I told him sometimes sticks. He fixed it. He has his bachelor's degree in Criminology from OSU, he's getting his associates in Automobile Maintenace (mostly to claim that he has the coursework), and he wants to work for a car insurance company doing fraud investigation.

..He graduated from OSU in 2006. So...he's young and cute. But if I ask him out, I will have to ask him out. Which means going to the car shop, batting eyelashes embarrasingly, and looking like a doofus. But, he's young and cute (and flirting? I'm really bad at guessing, but he saved me at least $200, and it seems a bit blatant). Patrick says maybe he thinks I'll tell my sorority sisters about him if he's nice. Which I have. Mechanic even said, "you referred people to me before you got your car back? That's very trusting of you." I told him that as long as my tires don't pop off on I-70, I'll be satisfied. He said he almost put that on my final bill but it's a legal document and he didn't want to cause confusion if I have to complain.

Final cost of the two axles, new bearing, oil change, and the spare tire, plus very typically expensive labor? $450.

Oh, and today on my way to work I found out that he also miraculously turned off my check engine light that I was under the impression is constantly on.

So...should I suck it up and ask him out? Where do I take him? Am I in 8th grade?

Anyway, I'm about to go eat wings at the dirtiest place on earth. Holler?

I'm good.

So we had a "risk management" speaker tonight, which is usually a speaker about alcohol or stalking. We did have one once where we had the fire department come in and smoke out our house and we had to crawl through the living room. Tonight, though, this woman who was a Tri Delta talked about her daughter, an Alpha Chi Omega, who was raped and then committed suicide.

It was odd, because the woman was kind of funny. And you're hearing this terribly gory story and she reads this emotional poem her daughter wrote about rape, then she'd talk about something else, then she'd make a joke or something, and it was just incredibly unsettling. She was very good though, and I am glad I went.

Until the end, when she started talking about how about 40% of women who are raped have sex with their attacker again. And she asked, "Why might that be?" And there are a variety of answers, including, "Because a lot of times, rape occurs in a relationship." And I wanted to sink into my chair. I almost had a panic attack; I almost ran out of the auditorium, but I held it together as best I could. Which wasn't that well--I was visibly shaking but I'm not sure anyone noticed.

I guess it was appropriate, then, that I met Alex at Starbucks after (he also went to the speaker). He was the first person I ever told about my experiences in that relationship, and a large part of how I got over it. It's difficult to write about, knowing that my father (!) reads this, but it is what it is. I feel I have gone a long way to recover. If Tri Delta is the reason I got out of the situation, Alex is the reason I am still alive.

The speaker also talked about what it is that a friend in that situation should do, if someone tells them they've been sexually abused, and to a tee, he did that. I will always owe him that. And I cannot end a friendship that has already given me so much. So, while Kate makes an interesting point about the amount of effort I am putting in, and dad makes an interesting point about Cosmo magazine (?!?), I really am incapable of cutting this one out of my life.

Also, Alex texted me today (thank you, Patrick) about getting Brennen's (the local coffee shop, which ended up being closed). It was nice to see him. And talk to him, for real. It was also nice because he could tell the presentation we had both just come from shook me up a bit, and was willing to talk about it just enough to where I got it off my chest but I still avoided crying in public. You can't buy friends like that.

...even if you think that my sorority membership is "buying friends."